NBA Finals, Game 2

Sometimes, you just have to throw your hands up and admit it.

There are certain athletes, at certain times, whose very presence means that the game is a foregone conclusion. We saw it here in Boston in the 80s, when good teams like the Hawks and Bucks folded up the tents as soon as Larry Bird walked into the building. We saw it in Cleveland in '99, when Pedro came out of the bullpen and every fan at Jacobs Field was immediately issued a shovel to bury the Indians. We all saw it whenever Michael Jordan took the floor.

I'm here, these guys seem to say. I'm taking over -- you might as well go home. Which brings us to Games 1 and 2 of the NBA Finals.

Shaquille O'Neal has become one of those players. I believe the final plus/minus for LA was +38 with Shaq in the game and -19 with him on the bench. And that sounds about right. Everyone connected with the NBA's been tripping over themselves for years trying to compare Kobe Bryant to Michael Jordan, but Shaq is the only guy who fits the comparison. When Shaq/Michael's on the court, it looks like they're playing a different game than everyone else. With Jordan, it looked like he was playing at full speed and everyone else was running through Jell-O. With Shaq, it looks like he's playing with a Nerf ball. The guy's unreal.

Of course, it helps when the refs refuse to call an offensive foul; I'd be curious to see if they blow the whistle if Shaq were to pick up Kerry Kittles and place him in a seat in the second row. But Jordan got every call under the sun, too, so I guess it's a wash.

One hopes that if someone in Jersey is malicious enough to try to mess up the Lakers with a tainted cheeseburger, they send it to the right room, unlike the moron in Sacramento. I think it's the only way that this becomes a series.